No. 14, Dec. 8, 1967, p. 13

Telling it like it is

Time for me to blast the filthy eastern ways

Time for me to blast the filthy eastern ways. I'm not even going to be poetic, there's too much of that garbage going down already. First let me assure you that I know what I'm talking about, I am a Master of all Eastern philosophy, Yoga, buddhism, occult science, and all the rest of that hooey, I'm something like an ex-junkie. I'm writing this as a warning to young people about to get hooked. Don't fall for this stuff, it'll turn you to stone, it may put a radiant smile on your face but it'll be carved in stone. There was a time when it was useful but to go back to it now is REGRESSION. We don't need beautiful logical explanations of the mysterious workings of the cosmos. we need MORE GUTS and MORE NITTY GRITTY! I'm warning you, it'll freeze you in your tracks, it STOPS GROWTH! The sickest people I have ever met in my life were long term believers, the ones who could spout all this crap about "we are all one" and "kharma" and "reincarnation" till kingdom come, they explained the whole fucking universe away to their sick little satisfaction and then they curled up and died. Talk about insanity, that's IT! There has never been an Eastern Master who could hold a candle to men. I said MEN, like Ben Franklin and Thomas Jefferson and Ralph Waldo Emerson and Abraham Lincoln and Franklin D. Roosevelt and, believe it or not, Robert Kennedy. Another one I have to lay on you is Clarence Darrow. These are the Immortals, they didn't have time to sit around and meditate on the divine workings of the cosmos, there was too much HARD WORK to do. Pretty hard to believe isn't it, all that crap sounds so tempting. Take it from me or be a jerk, if you go down that holy road you're beyond help, you'll explain yourself away until there's nothing left but a little puddle of brown goo and THAT'S your Nirvana .....

Mel Lyman